Wednesday, April 30, 2008


So, I got kinda busy. And started to ignore this blog. Then felt badly that I'd slacked off after only having done it for a couple of months. Today I left a comment on a blog and didn't realize that by using my Google account to leave it, it would link to this blog. Am dumb. Now I feel obligated to update (even though no one is reading it, which is prefectly fine), and have thus fallen into the most boring trap of writing about blogging. Am lame. But maybe it's good for me to get back to this. I have too many thoughts in my head with nowhere to go, combine that with too much freetime at work and you'd think I'd be an incredibly prolific blogger. Well, I'll give it a go. This can be like an epilogue to the past year.

What happened in the year I've been gone?

I planned a wedding.

I got married.

I traveled to Egypt and Jordan.

I saw the pyramids.

My family suffered tremendous loss and difficult illness. People are doing better.

My sister is engaged.

I traveled to meet up with friends, together we celebrated a new baby.

I saw some funny movies.

I stayed in shape and continue to eat healthy.

I decided I'm ready to have a family.

I went to a financial planner and figured out how to save for retirement. Stopped feeling badly for not saving for retirement (or continue to try).

My 1988 Toyota Corolla that my parents gave me in high school finally bit the dust. I bought my first car. It is practical, but cute.

I need to blog because I'm convinced that my life is the most boring thing and that I'm wasting my youth. That is incredibly dramatic and silly, but it's how I feel. It's made it harder and harder for me to keep in touch with friends that live far away, because I feel I have so little to say. I now dread talking on the phone. The main thought in my head all the time is how miserable my job makes me but that I have no idea how to make a change. The weekends are a chance to be free from those thoughts, but then I put all sorts of pressure on myself to try to live to the fullest on the weekends, since I don't during the week. I never live up to the expectations I have for myself. I need to plan ahead more. There are many things I need to do and I keep beating myself up for not doing then. Flossing is one of these things. I need to be more grateful for my life and appreciate the simplicity of things. Simple should be good. For me, simple is a symptom of laziness. Why can't I appreciate letting a weekend slowly develop? Why do I feel badly for not trying to get more out of it? See, this is the problem. I bore myself. Here and in life. What the hell is wrong with me?