Soy Chicken

There’s a café here at my work. Lately I’ve been trying to bring my lunches, but today I didn’t have anything. I took a look at the menu, which rotates, and was excited to see they had a vegetarian Japanese dish. They had named it Soy Chicken with Udon Noodles. Soy Chicken! The café was branching out. Yeah, so guess who ate half her meal, thinking, “Wow, this is so real tasting it’s almost creepy!” only to hit a bone and want to vomit? That would be me. What idiot names a dish Soy Chicken and makes it with real chicken? Motherfuckers. I’ve been a vegetarian for almost 15 years and haven’t once eaten meat, at least that I was aware of. I can’t get the feeling and taste out of my mouth. The smell is on my fingers. I just ate a whole bowl of strawberries trying to mask it all and nothing is working. I’m so angry. And I’m hungry because I only had half a lunch. MOTHERFUCKERS!